XM or Sirius?

My favorite quote regarding the Cowboys' loss to Seattle, from Steve Czaban's blog:

It took almost the entire first half, but wasn’t it worth it? You know what I am talking about. Watching a Cowboys game these days and just waiting around for a Terrell Owens drop is like watching Three’s Company repeats and waiting for Jack Tripper’s signature “fall behind the couch” move.

Czabe is the reason I miss XM sometimes. He's a regular guy who's a sports fan and talks about it like my boys and I do - equal parts knowledge and humor, and without engaging in any of the following misdirection to make himself sound smarter:

1. He doesn't do "The "Aikman," which has now spread like wildfire and engulfed the entire sports commentary world. By "The Aikman" of course I mean employ the following sentence structure at every important juncture of the game and twice on Sundays.

   When you talk about [insert specific football skill/coaching technique/defensive formation/offensive formation/memorable game/memorable play/etc.], you're talking about [insert applicable player/coach/game].

   For example,

   "When you talk about a guy who stabs people in the nuts and is on the cover of Madden the next year like nothing happened, you're talking about Ray Lewis."

   That sentence is the structural equivalent of origami. Why not just say, "Ray Lewis sure is lucky that America has such a short memory"?
   
2. He also doesn't insert "a" or the phrase "a guy like" before saying anyone's name to make his point sound more universal. Asshole, just described the specific person everyone knows you're making reference to! No more "When you have to line up in man coverage on a Chad Johnson, you better jam him at the line." No one believes that there is an army of Ocho Cincos in a warehouse in Cincy just waiting to show you that they can all get off the line with equally little resistance. Just say, "Chad Johnson will beat you every time if you don't bump him at the line." It's not brain surgery.
   
3. Finally, he doesn't start every sentence with "Obviously,..." as in:

   Obviously, [X team] is going to have to score more points in this football game if they want to go home victorious.

   Really, jerk off? I was incredulous the first few times I heard this one, but it hasn't subsided either. I thought that certainly, the only reason someone making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year to sit on their ass all weekend watching football games would say something that elementary would be as a preface to the meat of the analysis they're paid to provide. Nope. They all stop there. It's as if they have no sarcasm detector. Check this lightning bolt from the Colts/Ravens game this past Saturday while the Colts were bleeding the clock from 7:39 to 0:18. I'm pretty sure it was Simms, but I was going for my 25th Diet Dr. Pepper of the day:

   Obviously, the clock may become a factor here.

Nice, huh?

Makes that 8-to-5 with a 45 minute commute on either end sound great when these code-breakers are working three hours a week. I mean, there's no way they give any thought to what they're going to say during the week or it would have to come off better than this, right?

Oh well, it's not like I'm going to boycott, but damn... ! It's a real similar feeling to the one I have about this final season of The Sopranos. I'm going to tune in because it is what it is, but do what you can not to completely ruin it for me, will ya boys?

My switch to Sirius came last year when I got this monster installed in my car. My reasoning was that the NFL Network was on Sirius, which I just assumed I would like, and it would come in handy if I got caught on the road during Sunday games. I also wanted to check out Howard Stern's show, which is genius in spots and really off-putting in others. In truth, NFL Network's morning radio programs are mediocre at best, so now I'm without the best 2 morning drive sports shows: The First Team on Fox with Steve Czaban (Fox Sports Radio) and The Tony Bruno Show (Sporting News Radio). In a perfect world, Sirius would acquire the rights to broadcast both Fox Sports Radio and Sporting News Radio. In a less-than-perfect but still inhabitable world, Sirius would acquire the rights to broadcast one or the other. Of course neither has happened. Makes me wish the rumored XM/Sirius merger would take place already.

One small silver lining is that Tony Bruno can be streamed here, which is nice at work but doesn't help in the car. I haven't found a site to stream Czabe from yet. If anybody knows of one, hook me up.

If you don't know, now you know...