Blackberry Wallpaper, TMNT trailer, Watches

Here's my current Blackberry Wallpaper (Resized to 320w x240h). It shows Jonas "Snake Doctor" Blane and Mack "Dirt Diver" Gerhardt from Season 1, Episode 2, of one of The Unit.

Newest Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles trailer.

Finally, I ordered this Suunto T1 watch today. It measures heart rate, calories burned and whether you're in your target zone while exercising. Plus it looks really cool. Suunto's official site. No word on whether it includes motivational pixie dust too.

Polar is a watch brand Nathan put me on to. I almost ordered this one instead of the Suunto. A lot more expensive, but it has the heart rate monitoring capability and other exercise functions, along with a compass, altimeter and barometric pressure monitor.

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R.I.P. Curtis Manning

I don't think I've ever wanted someone to pull a trigger so badly on a TV show as I did when Curtis' history with Assad was revealed tonight.

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XM or Sirius?

My favorite quote regarding the Cowboys' loss to Seattle, from Steve Czaban's blog:

It took almost the entire first half, but wasn’t it worth it? You know what I am talking about. Watching a Cowboys game these days and just waiting around for a Terrell Owens drop is like watching Three’s Company repeats and waiting for Jack Tripper’s signature “fall behind the couch” move.

Czabe is the reason I miss XM sometimes. He's a regular guy who's a sports fan and talks about it like my boys and I do - equal parts knowledge and humor, and without engaging in any of the following misdirection to make himself sound smarter:

1. He doesn't do "The "Aikman," which has now spread like wildfire and engulfed the entire sports commentary world. By "The Aikman" of course I mean employ the following sentence structure at every important juncture of the game and twice on Sundays.

   When you talk about [insert specific football skill/coaching technique/defensive formation/offensive formation/memorable game/memorable play/etc.], you're talking about [insert applicable player/coach/game].

   For example,

   "When you talk about a guy who stabs people in the nuts and is on the cover of Madden the next year like nothing happened, you're talking about Ray Lewis."

   That sentence is the structural equivalent of origami. Why not just say, "Ray Lewis sure is lucky that America has such a short memory"?
   
2. He also doesn't insert "a" or the phrase "a guy like" before saying anyone's name to make his point sound more universal. Asshole, just described the specific person everyone knows you're making reference to! No more "When you have to line up in man coverage on a Chad Johnson, you better jam him at the line." No one believes that there is an army of Ocho Cincos in a warehouse in Cincy just waiting to show you that they can all get off the line with equally little resistance. Just say, "Chad Johnson will beat you every time if you don't bump him at the line." It's not brain surgery.
   
3. Finally, he doesn't start every sentence with "Obviously,..." as in:

   Obviously, [X team] is going to have to score more points in this football game if they want to go home victorious.

   Really, jerk off? I was incredulous the first few times I heard this one, but it hasn't subsided either. I thought that certainly, the only reason someone making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year to sit on their ass all weekend watching football games would say something that elementary would be as a preface to the meat of the analysis they're paid to provide. Nope. They all stop there. It's as if they have no sarcasm detector. Check this lightning bolt from the Colts/Ravens game this past Saturday while the Colts were bleeding the clock from 7:39 to 0:18. I'm pretty sure it was Simms, but I was going for my 25th Diet Dr. Pepper of the day:

   Obviously, the clock may become a factor here.

Nice, huh?

Makes that 8-to-5 with a 45 minute commute on either end sound great when these code-breakers are working three hours a week. I mean, there's no way they give any thought to what they're going to say during the week or it would have to come off better than this, right?

Oh well, it's not like I'm going to boycott, but damn... ! It's a real similar feeling to the one I have about this final season of The Sopranos. I'm going to tune in because it is what it is, but do what you can not to completely ruin it for me, will ya boys?

My switch to Sirius came last year when I got this monster installed in my car. My reasoning was that the NFL Network was on Sirius, which I just assumed I would like, and it would come in handy if I got caught on the road during Sunday games. I also wanted to check out Howard Stern's show, which is genius in spots and really off-putting in others. In truth, NFL Network's morning radio programs are mediocre at best, so now I'm without the best 2 morning drive sports shows: The First Team on Fox with Steve Czaban (Fox Sports Radio) and The Tony Bruno Show (Sporting News Radio). In a perfect world, Sirius would acquire the rights to broadcast both Fox Sports Radio and Sporting News Radio. In a less-than-perfect but still inhabitable world, Sirius would acquire the rights to broadcast one or the other. Of course neither has happened. Makes me wish the rumored XM/Sirius merger would take place already.

One small silver lining is that Tony Bruno can be streamed here, which is nice at work but doesn't help in the car. I haven't found a site to stream Czabe from yet. If anybody knows of one, hook me up.

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Firefox 2.0.0.1

Firefox 2 was released December 19. Download here. Release notes can be found here.

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Dwight-en someone's day

Be a pal. Have Dwight Schrute call someone to discuss their resume, werewolves or a truancy problem.


EDIT: For some reason, the linked page was removed from The Office's Season 2 DVD release site. Regardless, thanks to Catherine for Dwightening my day even when hers was going poorly.


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Saddam Hussein executed today.

Slate summarizes today's news on the subject. Among his last words was a simple "Moqtada," in sarcastic reply to guards taunting him by chanting the name of upstart Shiite cleric Moqtada al-Sadr, whose father and 2 brothers were gunned down in 1999 by men assumed to be working for Saddam.

Moqtada was the subject of Newsweek's November 28, 2006, cover story.

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Jack Bauer never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.

In honor of the coming premiere of the Sixth Season of 24, here are some of my favorite Jack Bauer Facts. And yes, I know these are a spin-off of the Chuck Norris Facts, but Jack Bauer flosses with Chuck Norris' tiny penis... and no, that doesn't make him gay. He just understands the importance of dental hygiene.

1. The only reason you're conscious right now is that Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you.
   
2. Once, someone tried to tell Jack Bauer a "knock knock" joke. Jack Bauer found out who was there, who they worked for, and where the goddamned bomb was.
3. Jack once shot himself 10 times, just to prove 50 Cent is a bitch. He then proceeded to wrestle an alligator while talking to Chloe about schematics.
4. If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
5. If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
6. On a high school math test, Jack Bauer put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Jack Bauer solves all his problems with Violence.
7. Sun Tzu once wrote, "If your enemy is weaker, conquer him. If he is stronger, join him. If he is Jack Bauer, you're fucking dead."
8. Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
   

*****

The illustration above was done by Antony Hare, a Canadian graphic artist. Check out his others. I especially like Christopher Wallace and Christina Ricci. He also imposes quite a Chairman of the Board feel upon George Clooney.

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DVD Release Countdown: The Departed

According to Amazon.com, the 2-disc Special Edition DVD of The Departed is set to be released on February 13, 2007. I saw it 3 times in the theater and 45 more days seems like an eternity. I'll be watching with my glass of cranberry juice at 5:01 p.m.

Amazon's information on this release's Special Features is sparse, but it looks like there will at least be some deleted scenes with introductions by Scorsese, a Boston mob history (probably focusing on Whitey Bulger), a Turner Classic Movies documentary on Scorsese and a featurette on Little Italy's influence on Scorsese. The front and back full-size shots of the cover found here indicate there probably won't be a feature-length commentary by Scorsese and/or any of the actors. If that comes about in the future, though, it will definitely be worth a re-up. Also, I'm more than a little disappointed that there appears to be no featurette on the adaptation process from Infernal Affairs. Again, not deterred in the least from picking it up on Day 1.

The poster to the right is one I'd never seen before. Amazon has it up on its Infernal Affairs page as an alternate DVD cover.

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That Damn Karzai!

Terrell Owens Blames Poor Game On Drew Bledsoe, Offensive Line, Hamid Karzai, NASA, Samsung

DALLAS—Troubled, underperforming Dallas wide receiver Terrell Owens lashed out in a press conference at the Cowboys practice facility...

Unfortunately, it looks like the jihad not only includes "Team America" but also "America's Team."

By the way, pretty cool node feature from the Onion.

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SNL Gift Guide

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